Bin Laden is Dead.

Bin Laden is dead
They shot him in the head
Ignore any outcry of hypocricy
It’s a great day for democracy

A mass murderer’s been terminated
By the western world he so much hated
Freedom and western values win
Over hatred, murder and endless sin

Just like his mate Saddam Hussein
Bin Laden was clearly most insane
A mass murderer so full of failings
Who plotted and killed 88 Australians

Rot in hell you murderous bastard
I hope it was worth it while it lasted
And as you enter through the gates of hell
Lucifer will no doubt yell

‘Come over here, sit next to me
This is the netherworld as you can see
You are in perdition for eternity
A murderous evil fraternity’

R.I.P our 3000 American sisters & brothers
And 88 peace loving Australians and many others
Who died at the hands of his evil Al-Qaeda cell
May Osama Bin Laden forever rot in hell.

No martyrdom.
No 72 virgins.
Just a bullet in the head.
And an eternity in hell.
Bastard.

RIVERS OF GOLD AND OCEANS OF DEBT

Wayne went to the cupboard to see what was there
But when he opened the cupboard the cupboard was bare
He searched high & wide for something to use
But all he could find were lots of IOU's

The reality dawned on Wayne and he felt sad
That due to his waste the situation was bad
Just 4 years ago he was rolling in cash
But it was all gone now due to decisions rash

After 4 years in charge of the nation's accounts
Wayne's under the pump as the pressure mounts
He's yet to deliver a set of positive numbers
Thanks to Wayne our economy encumbers

It seems Wayne has sold the family farm
His ineptitude has done so much harm
The Coalition’s surplus is spent
There’s no money left to pay the rent

Because Wayne’s such a silly duffer
Seems the rest of us must suffer
And thanks to all the wastage that he brang
We’re all now the victims of the ‘razor gang’

Even though we’re in the midst of Mining Boom Mk II
Wayne’s got absolutely no idea what to do
He assures us our economy’s in full throttle
But now the inflation genie’s out of the bottle

It’s one excuse after the next from Swan
As he tries to explain where the money has gone
“There’s no rivers of gold” is his latest regret
Because all the rivers flow into his ocean of debt*

* www.aofm.gov.au
As at April 21st Total Commonwealth Government Securities on Issue - $189.840 Billion

WAYNE'S PAIN (Diddums for Wayne)

Don’t you feel sorry for Wayne?
Can’t you just feel his pain?
As much as he’d love to fudge it
He just can’t balance his budget

Poor old Swannie laments
This unfortunate turn of events
That sees his budget completely destroyed
Economic ruin he couldn’t avoid

Because he was forced to waste
And had to spend so much in haste
As the ‘Gang of 4’ convened
And approved overpriced school canteens

Pissed billions against many walls
And built inappropriate school halls
Displayed such gross depravity
To put pink batts in your roof cavity

Which not only drained millions again
But caused the deaths of 4 young men
It cost over a billion to line your roof
Wayne’s fault? You got any concrete proof?

It’s not Wayne’s fault all those ‘green’ schemes
Didn’t develop into a tree-huggers dreams
How the hell could Wayne have known
That the costs would be so overblown?

He inherited a $20 billion surplus
But now that’s something we can’t discuss
Because after 4 years of being a dud
Swanny’s blamed it all on a flood

A tragic flood, absolutely no doubt
But for Wayne it’s his easy way out
And just to enforce his incriminating plan
Wayne also blames the earthquake in Japan

Again, an absolutely shocking human disaster
But Swanny, don’t lecture us like a schoolmaster
Your pathetic effort at spending our money
Is so sad it’s almost funny

So as we career towards $200B in debt*
And you thought you’d seen the worst of it yet
You thought the waste of money has been sinister?
Right now, Wayne’s our acting Prime Minister! (God help us…)

Our country has absolutely no hope
Under the leadership of this dope
Who destroys every plan he introduces
And all he offers is lame excuses

And when you get your next power bill
And you feel like you’re pushing shit uphill
Don’t worry, we can all relax
Because Swanny’s introducing another new tax

What did we do to deserve Gillard & Swan?
Normally credibility is a sine qua non
For political leaders in Australia
But everything this mob do is a failure

I don’t want your lame excuses Wayne
For inflicting so much unnecessary pain
And blaming everyone but yourself
For leaving fiscal rectitude on the shelf

Go cry by yourself in the corner Swanny
Excuses? We’ve already heard too many
You’ve wasted so much you’re an embarrassing bore
Don’t let the door hit your arse on your way out the door.

I'm bloody angry that this idiot, along with Rudd, Gillard, Wong, Garrett, Conroy & Combet are destroying consumer & business confidence and our fabric of life. Waste and recklessness. And massive debt.
And excuses.

*

The article in question:

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/national-affairs/people-in-politics/im-no-cold-hearted-cost-cutter-says-wayne-swan-as-he-prepares-for-his-toughest-budget/story-fn5nzhg1-1226042258193

MINORITY REPORT

Rudd remains preferred leader
Whilst Gillard’s losing ground
Swan has 10% support
This survey does astound

Rudd’s support’s dropped 21%
Since February last year
But he remains a clear favourite
Exactly why is most unclear

He’s still the same annoying bloke
Driven by self-centred goals
His narcissism drives his desire
To be back at the controls

Gillard’s support is dropping fast
The voters now realise
She’s completely out of her depth
And they won’t forgive her lies

With just 29% support
Down 11% since last May
The voters are sick of her dishonesty
And her government in decay

Then there’s the head wobbler
Wayne Swan got 10% on the report
Newspoll rang Swan’s friends & family
To garner that level of support!

1 in 10 would like Wayne Swan
To be leader of our country
But what the polling didn’t report
Was that 8% want Humphrey

And another 8% preferred Elmo
Whilst 9% would vote for Homer
The notion of Wayne Swan as PM
Is clearly a misnomer

The poll clearly shows they’ve lost the plot
And all levels of support
Such low numbers of approval:
It’s the Labor Minority Report!

Who are the 25% that make up the 'Uncommitted' as preferred Labor leader?

The REAL Newspoll:

Article here:
http://www.theaustralian.com.au/national-affairs/just-one-in-10-want-wayne-swan-to-lead/story-fn59niix-1226041224734

GREEN FOR A DAY

Today I'm feeling very green
Unable to express my thoughts
Can't communicate my anger
At Labor's waste & rorts

I’m suffering from writer’s block
Ideas? Can’t think of one
Now I know how Labor feels
Particularly Wayne Swan

A man bereft of fresh ideas
See how low he stoops
Spews out by rote the latest lines
Supplied by focus groups

Today I have a hangover
Like Swan, a bungled mess
My head wobbles, my speech is slurred
I must soon convalesce

Can’t get a clearing in my brain
To convey just how I’m feeling
To articulate my wish that Gillard
Was a victim of the glass ceiling!

I’m trying to wonder to myself
What we did to deserve her
We must’ve been a victim
Of some heartless saboteur

I lie on the couch motionless
My head a constant thud
And the pain is not eased at all
By thoughts of Kevin Rudd

What a narcissistic little man
In love with his reflection
Driven by a fall from grace
His own party’s rejection

I nod into a peaceful snooze
Pain allayed by my slumber
Suddenly I’m in a sweat
Nausea I must encumber

My free advice to friends & foes
When a hangover curses you
Dismiss thoughts of the Labor Party
Or you’re guaranteed to spew!

THE CONFESSIONAL

Gillard: I’ve lied to the public on so many occasions
I’ve reinvented myself at least 14 times
Swan: I’ve got no idea about treasury equations
I’ve squandered so much I should be tried for waste crimes

Shorten: I’m just a junior minister but act like such a smarty
I’ve knocked off one PM and I’m keen for another
Rudd: I’ve been sacked as PM by my very own party
I’ve fallen out with everyone, even my own brother

Garrett: I couldn’t even manage to give stuff away
I’ve been out of the fire and into the pan
Conroy: I don’t even listen to what the experts say
I’m spending tens of billions on an uncosted plan

Roxon: I’m arrogant and smug in everything I say
Even though I’ve achieved nothing in nearly 4 years
Plibersek: I speak down to people in a patronising way
I’ve proven to be very wet behind the ears

Faulkner: I’ve been unanimously judged the world’s most boring person
And couldn’t even last as a senior minister
Macklin: I’m just hanging around as situations worsen
And do nothing but say ‘Tony Abbott is sinister’

Wong: I failed my first posting so they moved me along
Now I’m stuffing up the Finance ministry
Emerson: All I’ve said and done has been proven wrong
Through my constant displays of rudeness and bigotry

Arbib: I’m a faceless man wielding my power
An egotistical warrior who just loves locking swords
Ellis: Does my hair look good? Am I paid by the hour?
Sorry, what was the question? Ummm, more women on boards?

TOO CLEVER.....BY HALF

We always knew they were halfwits
But now they’ve removed all doubt
When they said “100%”
Their estimation was 50% out!

“Every cent raised will go to families
By way of compensation”
But such talk has quickly proved nonsense
More A.L.P. obfuscation

I saw Greg Combet on my TV
Saying all money would be returned
But he lied through his teeth to all of us
You’d think by now we’d have learned

That Labor and honesty aren’t compatible
They go together like water and oil
And as more lies and stuff ups are exposed
The Labor façade continues to uncoil

And then there was the angry ant,
The snarling Simon Crean
When he said “all money” would compensate
There was no doubt what he did mean

But he too misled by 50 per cent
And more evidence is mounting
That Combet and Crean both graduated
From the 'Wayne Swan School of Counting'

Because Swanny’s the economic genius
Who can’t count past ten without removing his pants
He’s giving advice on economic matters?
Why would anyone take that chance?

Swanny’s completely stuffed the budget
Huge deficit and massive debt
So they’re trying to bring in another new tax
And that’s not the half of it yet

Because ‘all money’ won’t be returned
Only half will assist rising prices
These dickheads can’t count and they lie to you
And you’re left to your own devices

A dishonest bunch of crooks
Treating the public with a dismissive laugh
So whenever they give you a number
Make sure you divide it by half…


............... BUT WAIT ...............


...If you divide a number by half
It’s the same as multiplying it by two
And that folks is the way Labor
Goes about misleading you…..

Andrew Bolt's article here:
http://blogs.news.com.au/heraldsun/andrewbolt/index.php/heraldsun/comments/vote_us_well_give_you_back_half_your_money/