The Winningest of Losers

I can run faster than you, but I can't win the race

I've got you covered, but you I cannot displace

I got more votes than you, but you win the election

You promise stability, I sense insurrection

My party won 14 seats, yours lost 16

Your promise of credibility will never be seen

The voters swung to me, they swung against you

You scraped in with the Independents 'pas de deux'

So as you "open the curtains to let in the light"

I promise you you're in for one hell of a fight

Your lame coalition with the lunatic fringe

Will see your 'stable' government quickly unhinge

You can have Oakeshott, he's clearly unstable

And while Wilkie is willing, he is clearly unable

Windsor's been sucked in by his cousin spinmeister

And watch your back with Rudd; he's still the same shyster

So I'll sit back and watch as you slowly implode

This disastrous government I confidently forebode

Bad leadership, poor policies and mismanagement

As the Labor deficit and debt continues to augment

So whilst I offer you my most sincere congratulations

Don't get too far ahead of yourself with your aspirations

To the dustbin of history you will be consigned

And next time I'll be first across the finishing line