Saturday, January 1, 2011


On the morning of June 24th 2010
Labor buried his corpse, never to be seen again
The faceless men were so proud they’d ended the pain
Got rid of Rudd and installed Julia & Wayne

But Kevin wouldn’t lie down and go quietly
He was brooding and sulking and plotting privately
He picked up the blower: “Laurie Oakes speaking”
And unleashed his bile through vitriolic leaking

Rudd dumped on Julia and derailed her campaign
Nothing so subtle, he went for the jugular vein
A simple strategy, a sinister plan
“If I can’t be Labor PM, nobody can”

He told of her opposition to paid maternity leave
And her rejection of pension rises: who would believe?
Rudd unsettled Labor so much through disclosing these things
He became puppet master, pulling the strings

So Julia had to fly north to placate the dethroned
Kevin had her by the balls, she was well and truly owned
Labor couldn’t win the election with Rudd at the helm
But without Rudd in check, Julia could not rule the realm

Rudd’s bitter & twisted behaviour caught Labor unawares
So Julia promised him his beloved Foreign Affairs
He’d been rewarded for bastardry and blatant insurrection
And this allowed Rudd to plan his own political resurrection

Now Rudd travels the world at will, stopping all stations
Nothing will stop his ambition to lead the United Nations
Kowtowing to everyone, handing out random cheques
Nothing will stop this lunatic, so vain, so complex

Prepared to bring down his own party and watch Julia cower
He finds himself ironically in a position of increased power
Now more powerful in Labor than when he sat on the throne
They let him run unleashed, lest he get Oakes on the phone

Pushing his own agenda, running for office again
Whether it be at the UN or as a reborn PM
Nothing so dangerous as a deranged narcissist
Did the faceless men realise it’d end up like this?

As we enter 2011 with a government riddled with disease
And the slightest upheaval could bring it to it’s knees
Rudd sruts around recklessly praising Marxist dicators
He’s writing himself into history as one of the worst ever traitors

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