Monday, March 14, 2011


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Julia on Q&A: 'Quavering & Amateurish'

Julia on Q & A
I wondered what she’d have to say
How would she justify her lie
I half expected her to cry

A schoolgirl giggle at every question
Her posture gives me indigestion
She tells us of the Labor fairness
I’m astounded at her lack of awareness

That the voters are wanting to condemn
They’d prefer K-Rudd as their PM?!
She lies every time she opens her mouth
No wonder her polls are going south

Goodness me that’s Julian Assangë
Getting stuck into the shellshocked ranga
Accusing her of lies & treason
I think he’s right…but for different reasons!

Woops, she just mentioned Medicare
Careful Julia, don’t go there!
We all remember Medicare Gold
Another Julia failure story to be told

Amazing to hear the rusted ons
Clap as she tries to justify her cons
She's pursing her lips, flapping her hands
Making things up at every chance

She sounds quite shrill at that tough question
Not happy at the girl’s suggestion
That her NAPLAN scheme is most unfair
Julia’s lost for words right there!

A final question on her slaying of Rudd
She hides her hands to hide the blood
A movie comparison to Gwenyth Paltrow
Is typical of this surreal show

Surreal because Gillard sits there
That stupid grin and glowing hair
Oblivious to the anger in the community
Treating dissenters with impunity

That hour went too fast for my liking
But her poor performance was most striking
An hour of Gillard giggling and mincing
She was extremely unconvincing

If that’s the best that she can do
To appease the dissention and hullabaloo
She’ll never be able to justify this rort
And I leave you with this final thought:

What if the Australian voters had a ‘Sliding Door’*
And knew then what they’d voted for
When they elected a Rudd / Gillard ticket
They’d look back now and say “It’s just not cricket”

They’d say “I didn’t vote for a ragtag mob
Unable to perform the simplest job
They’ve wasted billions and I didn’t realise
They’d be so prone to ineptitude and lies”

So as the lights faded tonight on the QANDA set
After a performance she’d much rather forget
Julia turned to Tony Jones and said
“Let’s hit a bar, I need a red”

*Sliding Doors IMDB Website


  1. Really Arthur, is that your interpretation?
    I don't believe we were watching the same station.
    So was that truly Julie you had under observation?
    Or is your vision subject to biased narration?

    Her audience was keyed up to ask the tough questions
    Why must the Aussie PM suck up to the Americans?
    What makes you think that we are just like them?
    We're not, we signed a defense pact 60 years ago, you ken.

    The questions came from Left, and they came from the Right
    "Before your election your promised no carbon tax fright,
    You've broken that, why shouldeth we not thee verily smite?"
    "A lie it was, you've a Carbon Tax, for which I'm going to fight.

    "I've always said the ETS is my preferred campaign,
    But then at election the Aussie people gave us this refrain,
    'Windsor, Oakshott, me and Wilkie, oh, and Bob Brown again
    That's our preferred parliament, we'll vote to make it plain'".

    So the Greens then floated carbon pricing to build towards an ETS
    Independents said "look, if you can help the man on the land, then, yes!"
    And the committee worried about an inflation becoming a mess
    So the carbon tax would assist most householders with their bill paying stress.

  2. Big Ted, I'm feeling threatened by your poetic abilities! You've done very well to tell your story in verse, in rhyme.
    I don't agree (of course), but enjoy your point of view and passion.
    Can you just explain one thing: how can you believe the last line of your poem to be true? Gillard has already admitted the CO2 tax will impact on cost of living pressures. Theat's why they keep talking of compensation. How does that assist with bill stress?
    Thanks Big Ted.